Kylee LeRoux

Name: Kylee LeRoux

Age: 17, Fifth day of the sixth month

Gender: Female

Symbol: Her family symbol is the LeRoux flame, however her personal heraldry bears icons of both Pyretalon and the Shield of LeRoux, in addition to a pair of yellow eyes at the base of the flames as if in likeness to herself.

Occupation: Student at Beacon, second year, Huntress in training

Semblance: Kylee’s semblance is an anomaly, the ability it grants her is superheated skin, forcing her external temperature to rocket. However this trait can threaten her life if she either overheats or gets too cold, thus requiring that she wear heat regulation gear in order to protect others from the searing heat and keeping her body temperature stable. Kylee has control over her semblance, although she can lose control if she is emotionally distressed.

Appearance: Kylee has dark crimson hair, tied up into a ponytail. Her attire is predominantly her heat regulation suit, though she occasionally wears other, more normal articles. The Heat regulator suit is a large suit of armour, comprised of pressurised vents and tubes that allow her to keep her semblance in check. The suit is operated by a mixture of white and red dust, used to maintain her external temperature and keep her alive. The suit can also be used to vent any heat that builds up in a devastating attack or launch her into the air.

History: Due to Kylee’s semblance, her mother was killed giving birth to her. Leaving her Father heartbroken, but he still loved and cared for his daughter. Kylee inherited the LeRoux family name and with it the reputation of a skilled family of hunters, running back to the Beacon’s inception. Being of Noble blood Kylee was trained from a young age and quickly became a skilled warrior. She graduated at the top of her class from Signal and made serious waves in her first year, both earning the respect of her teacher and the ire of her fellow students.

Personality: Kylee is a chipper and bright girl, and tries really hard to please others. Though unfortunately she has a tendency to rub others up the wrong way by showing off her knowledge and talents in class, and unintentionally making others look bad.

Strengths:  Kylee excels in armed combat and tactics, she is an excellent at mitigating problems and adapting to most battlefield situations. She deals with most problems, personal or combat related with the same ruthless efficiency, wasting neither words nor time.

Weaknesses: Kylee cares far too much about what others think about her and will often dwell on harsh comments, causing her to lose motivation in some cases. In combat she is also restricted by her heat regulator suit and is unable to expend too much energy in combat for fear of raising her temperature too high. Equally if she gets too cold she will lose consciousness and die if the problem is not rectified.  

WEAPON

Name: Pyretalon and the Shield of LeRoux

Primary Form: Pyretalon takes the form of a large broadsword, diamond shaped and simple in its construction apart from the mechanisms built in the pommel. The Shield of LeRoux is a relic of the LeRoux family and bears the family symbol. Due to its age is has no additional forms.

Secondary Form: Pyretalon can be connected to Kylee’s heat regulator suit via cables in her inner wrist and the pommel of the blade. This allows her to channel heat and red dust int the blade, setting it alight.

History: Pyretalon was forged by Kylee using her bare hands while at Signal, the heat from her hands helped her to better craft the weapon, the contact of her bare skin on the metal making it more malleable and preventing the super hardened metal alloy from setting.

So after discussing things with the others, I'm going to have to say no to the semblance as a whole. Not only would a constant semblance require a massive aura drain, an external body temperature that boils water would act as constant auto-hit to everyone around her.

Would it be ok if I kept the semblance but just made it so that she can't control it. As in it turns on and off without her controlling it? So it wouldn't be on all the time, she just can't control when she uses it.

Hmm... depending on how it's worded and balanced, maybe.

Ok, I've edited it. Any better?

I'm not fond of the semblance, but I'll let Sei be the final judge. I do however, have a few number related things to poke at.

The bit on the weapon history, one line specifically:

Quote :

it can no longer melt in temperatures anything lower than an exploding star.

No. A supernova's temperature is estimated to average out to 1B kelvin, that's 1.0^11°C. Tungsten has the highest melting point of any metal, with a liquid temperature of a mere 3290 kelvin, or 3017°C. Even an alloy withstanding that temperature is beyond far-fetched, tantalum hafnium carbide is the current record holder for highest melting point (4,215°C). Tone that down a LOT.

One more thing, a skin temperature of 100°C would be negligible to any metal worth making a sword out of. Weapon metals typically require temperatures close to 1000°C to melt and remain liquid.

Fair point Snake, I'll make the change. I was trying to make it sound poetic-ish but it seems as though that kinda blurred the point.

I'm sorry, I really can't get behind the semblance. It just doesn't seem like a workable concept to me.

Should I just completely change it?

So... should I scrap this character or can I just edit it?

Hey Jacob, I think the semblance needs to be rewritten. Things we aren't really big on are the lack of control. I personally believe that if you can't control your aura, you couldn't even really use it. So I don't like that aspect too much. The primary issue however, is 100 degrees celcius will burn humans. And since its your aura causing this, I dunno how it could protect you from that heat. Your clothes would not burn I assume, but they would further work to heat up the character. I'm not a fan of that. I think everything else is good though.

Ok, I've made the alterations required to make her a little less unbalanced. Is this ok?

Other than the paragraph ending strangely(missing a word perhaps?), it seems okay. +1

Approved 2/2.